Eagles

‘Former’ Eagles Fan Leaves Letters Ripping Lane Johnson and the Eagles on Cars at Chickie’s and Pete’s

Mike Zarrilli | Getty Images North America

Sean Brace is attending the Eagles game tonight at The Linc, but he made a stop at Chickie’s and Pete’s, of course, before the festivities were underway. And here’s what he found in the parking lot. We’re going to dissect this below.

eaglesletter

  1. I’m kind of pissed he didn’t cite our article for his title. Come on, dude. Love how the date was copied, too. In red. Christmas colors it seems.
  2. Is he labeling Lane Johnson an alcoholic? Curling bottles of Jameson Whiskey? That’s a damn good workout, if I must say so myself.
  3. Screw most of the players who are pansies. Except Jason Kelce and the players who aren’t. They’re cool.
  4. A COACH IS A COACH IS A COACH IS A COACH IS A COACH IS A COACH IS A COA
  5. Tip-toed practices through the tulips. Could’ve saved the season if they didn’t do that.
  6. The Eagles could have been the next New England Patriots – that’s hype that never should have been believed just because Bill Belichick loved Chip Kelly. Yes, the Eagles won in New England last year, but come on. Hardly a reason to think they were on the verge of becoming a dynasty.
  7. The most sickening situation he’s ever heard of involving the Eagles. Like, really? Not the TO/McNabb thing? Signing Michael Vick? (Which, at the time, was a bad move echoed by mostly everybody.) I actually love the Eagles’ chances this season. Most people don’t.
  8. Dud Pederson and Lame Johnson. As if I could make two dick jokes out of both names. Oh.

Guarantee you this guy is sitting in the first row in one of the end zones.

UPDATE: And… really?

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