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#LoweRoast: Rob Lowe’s Roast Becomes a Glorious Ann Coulter Burn

Rob Lowe has been one of the most well-known faces over the past few decades. From 80’s pillar films such as The Outsiders, “Brat Pack” films such as St. Elmo’s Fire, and to his recent television success with Parks and Recreation, Lowe has sustained a lengthy career in the entertainment arena. When Comedy Central Roast of Rob Lowe aired last night, a lot of topics were up for grabs: Lowe’s heart-throb persona, partying escapades, his past sex tape, and more were all in bounds.


The roast’s lineup consisted of the following: Peyton Manning, Ralph Macchio, Ann Coulter, Nikki Glaser, Jeffrey Ross, Pete Davidson, Jimmy Carr, Rob Riggle, Jewell, and was hosted by David Spade. The roasters were hilarious, raunchy, and sometimes stinging in their jests at Lowe. David Spade came out declaring, “That’s right: we’re here to honor one of the biggest stars of 1987, with some of the biggest stars of 1984.” Spade also tackled Lowe’s up and down career later on, “For years Rob Lowe had a sex addiction. He cured it by getting less famous.”

Here’s more from David Spade’s opening:

 


Some of the other roasters crafted witty jokes surrounding Lowe’s generally limited film and TV success, his infamous 1988 sex tape, and more. Pete Davidson quipped, “People call Rob Lowe a bad actor, but that’s because they never saw him tell his wife he didn’t f— that nanny.” Peyton Manning also got into the pile on business, “The only thing you’ve been consistently on is Twitter, which is surprising because you’re never been able to master one character, let alone 140.”



Like most roasts, the roasters began drilling each other with comedic verbal jabs. Jewel had this to say about David Spade, “You all know his assistant tried to kill him. I guess the stress of answering the phone twice finally got to him.” Rob Riggle brought up Jewel’s musical success, “The only thing shorter than David Spade is Jewel’s greatest hits album.” Of course Nikki Glaser couldn’t let Peyton Manning get through the night without bringing up Tom Brady, “You’re like the Tom Brady of being in commercials. Like, the greatest.”


The most interesting turn of the night came when most of the speakers turned their attention to conservative Ann Coulter. During her set, many of her jokes fell flat, creating a bizarre awkwardness for people at the event and the viewers watching at home. Here are a sample of some of the jokes that came her way:

“Ann Coulter has written 11 books. Twelve if you count Mein Kampf.”- Nikki Glaser

“Is Pete white? Is he black? Ann Coulter needs to know so she can decide if she hates him.” — David Spade

 

 

 

Even the man of the night, Rob Lowe got into the act, It’s 56 days to Halloween. But I see that Ann Coulter is already in her skeleton costume.”


Rob Lowe eventually came to the podium with a few of his own comebacks, ” I want to thank everybody for trying to get under my flawless skin.” Lowe was amused the entire night, often laughing in good fun and enjoying each performer. He graciously ended the night with thanks and this speech, “This cast of mutants — I’m sorry, Ann, racist mutants — it hit me, I didn’t hit rock bottom 26 years ago. I hit rock bottom an hour and a half ago. How the f— did I end up here? I think it’s because I stopped drinking. Well, that ends tonight. Because it’s never too late to start making good choices. And by the way, if anybody’s got blow, I’ll meet you in the bathroom. I’m lookin’ at you Peyton Manning.”

Overall it was a great night with plenty of laughs. Look for the re-air on Comedy Central in the coming week if you missed it.

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